Robicelli's

Everyone have a nice weekend? Great. NOW PREPARE TO HAVE YOUR MINDS BLOWN!!!

Matt and I tried to have a very low-key weekend since Mercury is in retrograde and we’re trying to stay safe. Who knows how Mercury could be trying to kill us! Falling satellites? Marauding gangs of raccoons? Bears?

This lead to things like family visits and vacuuming- and most of all, working our way through our Netflix queue. I sat down to write today’s post with full intentions of actually writing about business stuff (seriously!), but then Matt threw this movie on, and it is too good for me NOT to share it with all of you so you can also experience it.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Eric Roberts’ latest cinematic tour de force……A TALKING CAT.

Yes, this movie is horrible, in the low budget “ha-ha this is so bad” way. In the “every single choice that was made in the creation of this movie was wrong” way. In the “I’m pretty sure Eric Roberts was drunk and recorded his part over Skype” way.  In the “Why is the entire score comprised of sample songs that came on a Casio keyboard in 1986” way.  To make it all better, the cat in the starring role looks SO PISSED to be in this movie.

All of that, however, is not what makes it amazing.

What’s amazing is that for the past hour, our cat Sammy has been sitting in front of the television, COMPLETELY transfixed by this movie. He’s been standing on his hind legs paying at the television, jumping up and down, loudly meowing in response to the dialogue. Damn cat can’t get enough of this thing.

This sloppy attempt at family filmmaking may have inadvertently created the first ever feline blockbuster. Soon enough, cats are going to be scouring the internet looking for videos of us. 

There are not enough words for me to adequately tell you how utterly craptastic this film was, but if you have a cat of your own, I implore….nay, I DEMAND you watch this film, then hit me up on Twitter or Facebook and let me know your cat’s reaction. If you can get photo or video even better, because I know I sure as hell ain’t getting tired of watching videos of people’s cats doing stuff.

The 1:10 mark remains the greatest moment I have ever viewed on American television.

Now for quick business stuff- Chambord brownies are out in the online store, but our flour & leavening free Passover brownies are in! And on top of that, four of our all time favorite and bestselling cupcakes is back today, so head to our locations and pick them up before everyone else grabs them!

PB&J: Vanilla cake, grape jelly, peanut butter buttercream, roasted peanuts

Chocolate Caramel Pretzel: Chocolate cake, salted caramel buttercream, crushed pretzels, ganache

Abuelita: Chocolate cinnamon cake, cajeta buttercream, crushed Abuelita chocolate

Southern Belle: Banana bourbon cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter bourbon pecans

The only movie I saw in theaters last year was “Brave”. Last “grown up” movie I saw in theaters was For Your Consideration in 2006. Yet every year I watch the Oscars, and have REALLY STRONG FEELINGS about it.  

This year, biggest feelings in this house was about the Diet Coke commercial. Rrrrrrraaaawwwwwrrrrrr. 

For the young’uns that follow us, these are the commercials Diet Coke used to show when I was a teenager:

YES.

YES YES YES.

WHY WAS IT NOT TOO HOT FOR PANTS.

So last night THIS masterpiece flashes across my television screen mid-Oscar, my jaw drops open and I don’t know what happened for the next couple of minutes because I must of zoned out, but when I came to Matt was PISSED. 

Hmph.

Every day, I see hundreds of women objectified to sell everything from beer to crackers. And one company- ONE- allows me to objectify a man from the comfort of my couch? I say: BRING IT.  I will drink diet soda by the palletful if this continues, regardless if it’s turining into cyanide or other mysterious substances in my digestive tract and slowly dissolving me from within! 

But Matt still has a problem with it. He says its degrading and disrespectful, that it reeks of desperation when a company is willing to stoop so low as to need to trot out a half naked man to sell its product, and that I’m as bad as any sexist man out there when I ogle a Diet Coke guy.

Whatever- I think he’s just jealous. Enjoy your Monday, everyone!

Southern Belle: Banana bourbon cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter bourbon pecans

Bea Arthur: Black coffee chocolate cake, cheesecake buttercream, espresso ganache

Milk & Cookies: Brown sugar chocolate chip cake, mascarpone buttercream, crushed chocolate chip cookies

Butterbrew: Butterscotch soaked cake, butterscotch buttercream, edible gold dust

Yesterday I found out I’m going to be an auntie, the NHL is coming back, AND I got to go to the Big Apple Circus- it was the most AMAZING day of my year so far! Totally better than Saturday when I sat in my pajamas and worked on the book all day. Or Friday when I did pretty much the same damn thing, but with chips and dip.

You have absolutely NO IDEA how happy I was here, and not just because I had 2 bags of cotton candy. You also cannot possibly understand how amazing this circus was. Go. Go now. It closes on Saturday, and you don’t even need kids to have an excuse to go. Hell- I really think it’s far better as an adult. My kids are looking at these guys spinning through the air without a net and saying “That’s AWESOME! I could TOTALLY do that!”. Matt and I are looking at these guys and going “SWEET JESUS! THE HUMAN BODY SHOULD NOT BE ABLE TO DO THAT!”

Seriously- watch this video. Go to the 1:40 mark.

How do you even figure out your body can do that?!?!?!

We are extremely proud to be able to support the circus through our company- not just because it was one of the most incredible experiences of my entire life (there may have been a lot of crying), but also because the Big Apple Circus is a non-profit organization (who knew?). The circus itself supports all their other work, such as performing in pediatric hospitals and nursing homes, teaching performance skills to at-risk youth both in American inner cities as well as in third world countries, free specially-designed shows for children with vision and hearing impairments, free shows for disabled children, and more.

For all those worried about their animals- you should know the circus treats their animals extremely well, and all their dogs are rescues. This isn’t just from a press release- they took me back to stables to see for myself, and they were the cleanest, most odorless stables I’ve ever seen. And I got to pet and kiss all the horseys and tell them how much I loved them! And then I started hysterically crying in front of all the performers and I’m pretty sure they were laughing at me. They’re just jaded because they get to pet horseys all the time and don’t realize how magical they are.

And they freaking curtsy!!!

If you decide to give a charitable donation to the Big Apple Circus this year to help support all their incredible work, you will get some amazing perks like interactions with the other non-horsey performers, gala receptions, invitations to rehearsals, AND it’s tax deductible. It’s like getting one of the most incredible moments of your entire life for almost-free. 

Now go make yourself super giddy and eat some cupcakes! They always make you happy, don’t they? And really- try to get to the circus this week. They’re also coming back around to NJ in a couple of months, so you’ll get a second chance if you’re just too dang popular this week.

Liddabit: Chocolate cake, salted caramel nougat buttercream, roasted peanuts, ganache and caramel drizzles

Southern Belle: Banana bourbon cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter bourbon glazed pecans

PB& Raspberry J: Vanilla cake, raspberry jelly, peanut butter buttercream, roasted peanuts

Bailey’s Cheesecake: Chocolate Bailey’s cake, Bailey’s cheesecake buttercream, cake crumbs

Not even going to lie: had a really cool idea for the Tumblr last night, came home, sat down, flicked on the tv last night for some background noise, and “The Departed” was JUST starting at literally that very second.  

So, you know, I had to watch it. Meaning I didn’t write anything last night, and I totally didn’t wake up early today to do it either.

I’m standing by my decision though. That movie is worth it. Also worth it? Heading to the store and picking up one of these:

Clockwise from front: Chocolate Cheerwine, Southern Belle, Pumpkin Caramel, Tres Leches

Pumpkin Caramel: Pumpkin cake, salted caramel buttercream, candied pumpkin seeds

Southern Belle: Banana bourbon cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter bourbon pecans

Chocolate Cheerwine: Chocolate cheerwine cake, chocolate buttercream, Cheerwine simmered cherries, ganache

Tres Leches: Three milk soaked brown butter cake, dulce de leche buttercream, caramel shards

PS! We have a new product going into select stores today. No time for details here- blame Scorcese. Head to Facebook where I’ll be spilling more details.

I had a really nice blog post plotted out for today with pictures and links and etc, and then my stupid jerk face Internet connection decided not to work. Now i have to do it on my phone, where I really can only use text, my fat-ass thumbs, and tempt the autocorrect Gods. So, erm, we’re going to use our imaginations to put this together, ok?

First we need to start with an image. Now everyone all together picture in your minds a really nice shot of a vineyard. Maybe the sun is rising over it. Big white fluffy clouds, sky a thousand colors, lush red grapes. And since Im not at the mercy of Google images, let’s throw a sexy farmhand in there too. Maybe, you know, some grapes exploded in the heat and it got all over his shirt and he had to take it off, you know? And now he’s getting exploding grape juice all over his skin so he has to start pouring jugs of water all down his body, and he’s just glistening all over with the sun hitting those thousands of beads of water just right. And it feels really good, so he’s going to need to run his fingers though his hair reeeeaaalllly sloooowwwllly and sort of flex his arms a bit while he’s doing it, because he’s also so very very sore from lifting heavy things all day. Maybe then he does some pushups to dry off, because, you know, it like raises his body heat or something so all the water and grape juice evaporates.

Now, um, what were we supposed to be talking about again?

Ok, wine. We’re doing a pop-up on the North Fork. More details later today when my Internet is fixed and I’ve taken a cold shower. Or six. You can never be too clean.

Now everyone is going to imagine a picture that features THESE sexy sons of bitches!

Cherries Jubilee: Vanilla cake, cherry vanilla buttercream, brandies cherries

Peach Cobbler: Peach cake, vanilla buttercream, sautéed peaches, brown sugar streusel

Triple Chocolate Raspberry: Chocolate cake, ganache, chocolate raspberry buttercream, fresh raspberry

Southern Belle: banana bourbon cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter bourbon pecans

Congratulations to Shane O’Neill on winning Spike TV’s Inkmaster!

If you remember, Matt was tattooed by Shane on Inkmaster’s third episode, but we weren’t allowed to talk about the show or his tattoo for contractual secrecy reasons. Now that it’s over, here’s a GIGANTIC photo of Matt’s tattoo!

It’s even more remarkable in person. Trust me - I’ve been waking up to it every day for six months now.  Look at the subtle striations on the Robocoup blade! I mean, that’s just bananas! Seriously, if you ever run into Matt in person, don’t be shy about asking to see this thing. It’s without question the best tattoo I’ve ever seen in my life, and definitely deserves to be enjoyed.

Also, he got our kids names put into it, but didn’t get my name because he claims it’s “bad luck”. At least that’s what he tells me.

In totally unrelated news, last night Matt and I attended the official “Call for Entries” party for the 2012 Food Film Festival! This was one of my favorite food events of last year, so we were thrilled to be able to be a part of it again. Click here to learn more about how you can submit a film!

Now for cupcakes - Chocolate Caramel Pretzel is BACK! This one is one of our most popular ever, so go find out what all the fuss is about!

Clockwise from front: Oatmeal Cream Pie, Chocolate Caramel Pretzel, Southern Belle, German Chocolate

Oatmeal Cream Pie: Brown sugar oat cake, vanilla marshmallow buttercream, oat crisp

Chocolate Caramel Pretzel: Chocolate cake, salted caramel buttercream, crushed pretzels, salted caramel, ganache

Southern Belle: Banana cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter bourbon glazed pecans

German Chocolate: Chocolate cake, salted caramel buttercream, roasted coconut

___________________________________

Cupcakes Available at:

Hom: Third Avenue and 88th Street, Bay Ridge

Cafe at Sam’s Bakery:  94th off 3rd, Bay Ridge

Battery Place Market: 77 Battery Place, Battery Park City AND 200 West Street, Goldman Sachs Building

Joe Columbia University: W. 120th Street btwn Broadway & Amsterdam, Morningside Heights

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

_______________________

Whoopie Pies Available At:

Red Hook Lobster Pound: 284 Van Brunt Street, Red Hook

Tazza Cafes: Clark off Henry AND Henry off Atlantic, Brooklyn Heights

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

_____________________

Brownies Available At:

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

Oaxaca Tacos: 250 4th Avenue- Park Slope Brooklyn; 251 Smith Street Cobble Hill Brooklyn; 16 Extra Place, LES Manhattan

We’ve got news to talk about today, some pretty big news in fact, but we’re all going to have to hold off for a minute while I go off about something that has nothing to do with baked goods. (surprised?)

If you don’t know them, this is Moose A. Moose and his sidekick, Zee. Yes it’s a cartoon moose and bird, but this is important. Seriously.

Anyone who has children under the age of 10 knows who they are.  They’ve acted as the “MC”s of Noggin/NickJr, the 24 hour preschool channel, filling the voids between shows that would on other stations be filled with commercials. Moose and Zee are pretty much the Big Bird & Snuffy of my children’s generation.

When you have characters that beloved by young children, characters that are as much a cultural touchstone to any person born in the past ten years as Mr. Rogers was to my generation, a corporation like Nickelodeon/Viacom does the only logical thing:

It kills them off.

Ok, they didn’t say that they’re dead outright. But when someone just up and disappears, whether they’re a union leader, government informant, or a singing dancing moose, NOTHING good has happened. That’s a fact. 

Viacom says “they’re off to their next adventure”. Which is code for “Your children’s beloved icons of their formative years were interfering with our ability to run commercials, so they’ve ‘had a little accident’. Now watch these ads commanding you to buy Fresh Beat Band CDs while we clean up this mysterious pool of blood and yellow fur by the trash compactor”.  NOT. COOL.

Do you know how utterly sad and pathetic young children sound when saying “Where’s Moose? I want Moose!”. All the while you know full well that after ten years of loyal service, his head is hanging on a wall somewhere so Nickelodeon can replace him with commercials?!?! 

The only thing that’s holding me together and convincing me that I’m not totally irrational for being mildly brokenhearted about this, is the fact that it appears every parent in America is crazy pissed off about this, as evidenced by the insane amount of petitions that have cropped up online.

Before you go dismissing how silly this is, imagine for a quick minute that Sesame Street fired Big Bird and replaced him with an advertisement. If Mr. Roger’s replaced the Land of Make Believe with “The Land of Product Placement & Integrated Marketing Solutions”. If Jem & the Holograms had fired…….um…..well, ok, Jem was a giant commercial. But she had really pretty hair, so that doesn’t count.

So if you believe in childhood, believe in the dreams of a little moose from Saskatoon who wanted nothing better than to come to America for a chance at the big time, singing and dancing his way into the hearts of our children- the future of this great nation- well goshdarnint, sign one of these crazy petitions. Or better yet, visit the Nick Jr. Facebook page and leave messages on their wall demanding information proving that Moose and Zee are alive and being held in a safe location. I mean, it’s Monday. What better way to kick off your week than by writing inflammatory material on the Facebook wall of a big, faceless corporation that obviously hates babies.

Speaking of Facebook, we made a super secret announcement over on our page this weekend that we’re not mentioning over here. Because I like being sneaky! TEEHEEHEEHEEHEE!!! But seriously, you should check it out and “like” our page and all, because it’s really awesome news, AND unlike 99% of the crap that’s been on this blog recently it actually has to do with baked goods. Facebook= baked stuff. Twitter= me looking at shiny things and yelling about what’s on the tv. Tumblr= cat pictures, and posts which I’m certain will be the roots of an eventual “manifesto” of some sorts. Write that down to keep it all straight.

Now for all the people who tuned out two seconds into today’s post- tune back in! Actual important announcement! (yes, really!) We’ve got a new spot - actually, two new spots, carrying both the cupcakes and the whoopie pies (that includes the Nutella whoopies!).  Upper East Side & Gold Coast Long Island, you’re finally in luck!

Clockwise from front: PB&J, The Ebinger, Southern Belle, German Chocolate

PB&J: Vanilla cake, grape jelly, peanut butter buttercream, roasted peanuts

The Ebinger: Chocolate cake, chocolate custard buttercream, chocolate fudge, chocolate cake crumbs

Southern Belle: Banana cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter bourbon glazed pecans

German Chocolate: Chocolate cake, salted caramel buttercream, roasted coconut

______________________________

Cupcakes Available at:

Cafe at Sam’s Bakery:  94th off 3rd, Bay Ridge

Aloha Grinds: 77th and 3rd, Bay Ridge

Crespella: 7th Ave off 9th Street, Park Slope

Tazza Cafes: Clark off Henry AND Henry off Atlantic, Brooklyn Heights

Battery Place Markets: 77 Battery Place AND 200 West Street (Goldman Sachs Building), Battery Park City

Cake Shop: Ludlow btwn Stanton & Rivington, LES

Joe Columbia University: West 120th btwn Broadway & Amsterdam, Morningside Heights

NEW! Grace’s Marketplace: 1237 Third Avenue, Upper East Side

NEW! Grace’s Marketplace: 81 Glen Cove Road, Greenvale, Long Island

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

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Whoopie Pies Available At:

Red Hook Lobster Pound: 284 Van Brunt Street, Red Hook

Tazza Cafes: Clark off Henry AND Henry off Atlantic, Brooklyn Heights

NEW! Grace’s Marketplace: 1237 Third Avenue, Upper East Side

NEW! Grace’s Marketplace: 81 Glen Cove Road, Greenvale, Long Island

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

______________________________

Brownies Available At:

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

Oaxaca Tacos: 250 4th Avenue- Park Slope Brooklyn; 251 Smith Street Cobble Hill Brooklyn; 16 Extra Place, LES Manhattan

The results of LogoSearch Round One are in, and your pick was……..

NUMBER ONE with 47% of the vote!!!! Let’s all give it up for Number One, ladies & gentlemen!!!

If you’re wondering where your horse placed, sketch #2 had 19% of the vote, and sketch #3 had 34% of the vote. Good effort guys! Unfortunately, since you lost, you’ll now immediately be deleted from my hard drive and never seen again. 

As I mentioned in Monday’s post, a lot of people said the only reason they had voted for #3 was because they liked that it said “Brooklyn”. I mentioned this to Isaac Lubow, our graphic designer, internet treasure and animal lover, and he promptly sent me the following second drafts:

See that?! He listened to your input! What a guy! But then there was this…..

CIRCLES! This isn’t the original plan! I mean, yes, it’s the same font, but now there’s all the friggin’ circles, and I’m in love with them!!! I’m sort of beginning to get nostalgic for all those past designers who consistently showed me things that I hated and just had to pick the one I could deal with.

And I haven’t even gotten into deciding on colors yet! I’ve had suggestions of dark chocolate brown with blue accents.  Navy and maroon.  Orange and blue, but those are NY Islander colors and I’d rather be slathered with honey and eaten by starving tigers than be reminded of the Islanders. Or Devils. Or Flyers.

A friend of mine has been going on and on and on and on about the colors like if I pick the wrong one, the entire company is going to immediately implode (though she is a marketing executive or something like that. I don’t know- she said it once….I wasn’t really paying attention). She’s been lobbying HARD for the color orange, which to be honest, has never been my favorite. Of course, as an overachieving fellow mother, it’s not enough just to have an argument. She has provided an entire report of cold hard facts on my Facebook page to beat all the other color choices into submission!

“Orange combines the energy of red and the happiness of yellow. It is associated with joy, sunshine, and the tropics. Orange represents enthusiasm, fascination, happiness, creativity, determination, attraction, success, encouragement, and stimulation. (note: I had NO IDEA that all this was going on in color! What else are you compelling me to do, orange?!?!? I’m onto you now, you bastard!!!)

To the human eye, orange is a very hot color, so it gives the sensation of heat. Nevertheless, orange is not as aggressive as red. Orange increases oxygen supply to the brain, produces an invigorating effect, and stimulates mental activity. It is highly accepted among young people. As a citrus color, orange is associated with healthy food and stimulates appetite. Orange is the color of fall and harvest. In heraldry, orange is symbolic of strength and endurance. (note: look up “heraldry” and see if this statement is a reference to porn)

Orange has very high visibility, so you can use it to catch attention and highlight the most important elements of your design. Orange is very effective for promoting food products and toys.” - From ColorWheelPro.com

Me? I don’t know what to think.  Right now, I’m sort of feeling very violated by every color on the wheel. They’re just sitting there, reflecting their rays of light, shooting them straight into my retinas thinking they can manipulate me to do their bidding. 

But really, Heather is right.  Picking a color isn’t just about something I like or think looks cool.  This is pure, hard science - the science that ties all of us and everything we see together into one entity.  This is not an occult science. This is not one of those crazy systems of divination and astrology. That stuff’s hooey, and you’ve got to have a screw loose to go in for that sort of thing. This science is fairly commonplace and simple to understand. Humankind is simply materialized color operating on the 49th vibration. You would make that conclusion walking down the street or going to the store. 

This week, come join the discussion on Facebook. Isaac and I will be listening to all your ideas and opinions as we go on from this point. And you know what will help you come up with good ideas? CUPCAKES IN YOUR MOUTH.

Clockwise from front: Tiramisu, Bea Arthur, Southern Belle, Oatmeal Cream Pie

Tiramisu: Espresso soaked cake, espresso ganache, mascarpone buttercream, cocoa powder

Bea Arthur: Black coffee chocolate cake, cheesecake buttercream, espresso ganache

Southern Belle: Banana cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter bourbon glazed pecans

Oatmeal Cream Pie: Brown sugar oat cake, marshmallow buttercream, oat crisp

___________________________

Cupcakes Available at:

Cafe at Sam’s Bakery: 94th Street off 3rd Avenue, Bay Ridge

Aloha Grinds: 77th & 3rd Ave, Bay Ridge

Bagel Schmagel: 76th & 3rd Ave, Bay Ridge

Blue Apron Foods: Union Street off 7th Ave, Park Slope

Tazza: Clark St off Henry AND Henry St off Atlantic, Brooklyn Heights

Eastern District: Manhattan Ave off Eagle, Greenpoint

Brooklyn Standard: Nassau Street off Jewel, Greenpoint

Cake Shop: Ludlow btwn Stanton & Rivington, LES

Brooklyneer: 220 West Houston Street, West Village

Bar 5F at Bergdorf Goodman: 5th Avenue & 58th Street, 5th Floor, Manhattan

Queen City Cupcakes: Patchogue, Long Island

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Whoopie Pies Available At:

Red Hook Lobster Pound: 284 Van Brunt Street, Red Hook

Tazza: Clark St off Henry AND Henry St off Atlantic, Brooklyn Heights

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

_________________________________

Brownies Available At:

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

Oaxaca Tacos: 250 4th Avenue- Park Slope Brooklyn; 251 Smith Street Cobble Hill Brooklyn; 16 Extra Place, LES Manhattan

Lent is finally here! YES, I’m excited about it! 

You heard me, shocked kitten!!! I said I’m excited about Lent. In fact, it’s actually one of my most favorite times of the year. I did a big blog post about it last year, but I’ll try summing it up real quick for those of you who don’t want to do the whole click-through sha-bang:

- When I can’t have meat on Fridays, I remember that a few years back, I was lucky enough to be eating any food at all. And that there are millions of people all over the world who don’t have so many choices of things to eat, if they’re lucky enough to have the choice to eat in the first place.  I have food to eat and healthy children. Life is good.

- I also stopped giving up tangible things, because God doesn’t really care if I don’t eat tacos for 40 days. I mean, I’m just going to go right back to eating excessive amounts of tacos after Easter. Not like this is a marathon or other feat of endurance where God’s handing out medals and free Subway sandwiches at the end.

- Instead of giving up a “thing”, I give up one of my bad qualities. You know how we all made New Years resolutions, and then halfway through January they all went to crap? Well, they say it takes about 30 days of doing something every day to make it a habit, and Lent is 40.  And God will be much happier with me for growing into a better person than for giving up carnitas. Plus, he wouldn’t want my taco lady to lose money over this! I’m sure he loves her, because her tacos are so delicious that I’m sure they’re going to be served in heaven!

Heaven will also have rivers filled with Mexican Coke, and an Unlimited Peanut Butter Oreo Tree.

Last year, I gave up being jealous of what other people had, and not only did I become happier, but instead of just coveting peoples things (totally a sin!), I started working harder for the things I wanted. Does this means I’m perfect at it? Not even remotely. But it DOES mean that one year later I’m conscious of it when I slip up, and that I take steps to work at being better.

This year, I’m going to try and give up fear. Yes, this sounds, and probably is, incredibly stupid. There are risks I have wanted to take, situations where I have wanted to stand up for myself, brass rings I have wanted to reach for, but haven’t because I’m terrified, or unsure of myself.  Behind the scenes, I’ve actually suffered from crippling panic attacks for nearly 20 years, and I am incredibly tired of them taking over my life.  

Every time an iota of self doubt enters my head, I’m going to be like “AAAAY! What the f*$k is wrong with you you little p*)$#y a$$ b*@#h!?!?!?! Get the mo*#$*f&$*@# sand out of your v@#$(*, grow some G-ddamn b*@ls and kick some (*$&(#$#_!”.  And then I will crush my enemies with rock solid fists of fury and leave a trail of scorched earth behind me!!!! 

Or I might just finally finish the business plan up so we can seek investors and finally move a step closer to opening a full bakery again. I told the world we had no plans to ever open a proper shop until the kids were in school. Well, Atticus starts kindergarten this fall. It’s time to get on with this and stop procrastinating.

It’s also time for me to get the balls to sign up for the breakdancing class at my gym. I will not only leave this Lent a stronger person, but also poppin’ and lockin’ as I go forth.

Head on over to our Facebook page to share what you’re giving up if you’re on board with the whole Lent thing.  Now onto today’s cupcake flavors- King Cake is back, but since it’s not colored for Mardi Gras, it’s going by it’s French name of “Pithivier”. Still delicious!

Clockwise from front: Rue McClanahan, Pithivier, Southern Belle, Tiramisu

NEW! Pithivier (King Cake): Almond cake, almond pastry cream, almond custard buttercream, feuillitine

Southern Belle: Banana cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter bourbon glazed pecans

Rue McClanahan: Peach cake, cheesecake buttercream, brown sugar peach compote

Tiramisu: Espresso soaked cake, espresso ganache, mascarpone buttercream, cocoa powder

___________________________________

Cupcakes Available at:

Hom: Third Avenue and 88th Street, Bay Ridge

Cafe at Sam’s Bakery:  94th off 3rd, Bay Ridge

Battery Place Market: 77 Battery Place, Battery Park City

Joe Columbia University: W. 120th Street btwn Broadway & Amsterdam, Morningside Heights

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

_______________________

Whoopie Pies Available At:

Red Hook Lobster Pound: 284 Van Brunt Street, Red Hook

Tazza Cafes: Clark off Henry AND Henry off Atlantic, Brooklyn Heights

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

_____________________

Brownies Available At:

Crespella: 7th Ave off 9th Street, Park Slope

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

Oaxaca Tacos: 250 4th Avenue- Park Slope Brooklyn; 251 Smith Street Cobble Hill Brooklyn; 16 Extra Place, LES Manhattan

Over the weekend, Matt got about a thousand Facebook messages and phone calls hoping that he was “getting his drink on” for his birthday.  And this is how you know you’re getting old- when you just don’t understand why you would do that for your birthday. Spending a fortune to scream at your friends in a bar, making an ass out of yourself, waking up the next day with your head in the toilet, and starting the next year of your life with the memory of the time you ran down 5th Avenue naked. (and yes, this may have been one of our past birthdays- though we won’t say which one)

What did we do for Matt’s birthday? After taking our son for his kindergarten admissions test (one of the most insane experiences of my life, which I will blog about another day when I can fully articulate how batcrap crazy I am in real life), we bought a ton of Italian food as Pastosa, curled up into bed to watch the NHL all-star weekend, then spent hours YouTubing “mascot fights”.

Much worse ways to spend a birthday.  And the grand finale? Baking! Go have some birthday cupcakes!

Clockwise from front: Pecan Potato Chip, The Hinsch, Blueberry Cobbler,Southern Belle

Pecan Potato Chip: Pecan potato chip cake, vanilla buttercream, crushed pecans and potato chips, salted butterscotch

The Hinsch: Chocolate malted cake, vanilla buttercream, malted chocolate sauce, homemade chocolate malted milk balls

Blueberry Cobbler: Vanilla cake, vanilla buttercream, wild Maine blueberry compote, cinnamon streusel

Southern Belle: Banana cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter bourbon glazed pecans

______________________________

Cupcakes Available at:

Cafe at Sam’s Bakery:  94th off 3rd, Bay Ridge

Aloha Grinds: 77th and 3rd, Bay Ridge

Crespella: 7th Ave off 9th Street, Park Slope

Tazza Cafes: Clark off Henry AND Henry off Atlantic, Brooklyn Heights

Cake Shop: Ludlow btwn Stanton & Rivington, LES

Joe Columbia University: West 120th btwn Broadway & Amsterdam, Morningside Heights

Battery Place Market: 77 Batter Place, Battery Park City

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

Whoopie Pies Available At:

Red Hook Lobster Pound: 284 Van Brunt Street, Red Hook

Tazza Cafes: Clark off Henry AND Henry off Atlantic, Brooklyn Heights

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

Brownies Available At:

Crespella: 7th Ave off 9th Street, Park Slope

Queen City Cupcakes: West Main Street, Patchogue, Long Island

Oaxaca Tacos: 250 4th Avenue- Park Slope Brooklyn; 251 Smith Street Cobble Hill Brooklyn; 16 Extra Place, LES Manhattan

To recap for all of those joining this blog late, recently Matt “fired” me from the kitchen so that I could handle other important projects: logistics for Madison Square Eats, concentrating on DeKalb, building our online store, working on the cookbook etc.  But priority number one is finishing a project that I started last July and haven’t finished……

Writing our business plan.

Last year Matt and I realized that if we were going to grow this company to where we want (which will involve lots of robots), we needed a partner. Someone to take over operations while we did all the other fun stuff that makes Robicelli’s happen, like product development, taking meetings, making comic strips in MS Paint and writing blog posts that have absolutely nothing to do with cupcakes.  And to find the right partner who completely understood our vision, and to get enough capital that we could afford to pay them a good salary, plus have enough to buy ourselves some sweet gold-plated fur coats, we’d need a killer business plan.

I’d like to say that I do kind and altruistic things because I’m just innately a good person, but the truth is that I desperately want to get into heaven, because I know hell is not some dark circle of fire but rather a room bathed in florescent light where one is condemned to an eternity of writing business plans.  I have written these several times before, each time praying it will be my last, but to no avail. It does not get easier each time you write one- it is only more painful because you can feel entire years coming off your life as you are researching and writing it.

To illustrate my point, I left my webcam on while I worked tonight. You can see how it went yourself.

8:30 pm

8:45 pm

9:00 pm

9:01 pm

9:30 pm

10:00 pm

10:30pm

11:00 pm

11:30 pm

Midnight

Got 10 pages done!  We’ll be rolling in the big bucks in no time!  Watch out, venture capitalists of America, because Allison Robicelli is coming to BLOW YOUR MIND WITH BAR GRAPHS!!!

And Matt made some cupcakes.  Here they are!

Clockwise from front: Southern Belle, Blueberry Cobbler, German Chocolate, Key Lime Cheesecake

Available at:

ROBICELLI’S AT DEKALB MARKET: Flatbush Ave Extension & Willoughby Street, Downtown Brooklyn

CAFE AT SAM’S BAKERY: 94th Street off 3rd Avenue, Bay Ridge

A warm welcome to our legions of new Tumblr followers!  I have no idea what happened this week that caused our following to surge because as we all know, I am no good at this dangfangled internets.  But no matter- we sure as hell are glad to have you all aboard!

Now I have to turn our attention away from cupcakes and me being a smartass for a bit, because I have something really important to talk about.  More important than cupcakes.  Or zombies.

Last week, my state senator introduced legislation that would not only ban gay marriage in New York State, but would mandate that NY refuse to acknowledge all gay marriages performed in other states.  He said that people in his district “don’t give a rat’s ass about social issues”, and would prefer the government to concentrate on the economy.

Go take a break to punch something.  That’s pretty much what I do every time I think about him saying that.  And once upon a time I voted for this guy, which I sincerely apologize for, and promise to never never never never do again.

Let me quote that again, so it can really sink in:

We “don’t give a rat’s ass about social issues”, and should be focusing on the economy.

First off, way to insult your constituents Senator! Very proud to have given you my vote!

Secondly, if we don’t care, then why are you wasting your time drafting legislation about a social issue?  Why aren’t you working on an economic bill?  Maybe a bill that could bring close to $400 million dollars to the state, with nearly all of it being spent on small businesses?  If only I could think of something that could actually have that sort of financial impact on small businesses, which have been closing in record numbers and struggling to make ends meet for the past three years……hmmmmm…….wait a second!  That’s freaking gay marriage!  I must be some sort of genius or sorcerer or something!

I’m not really good at sitting still when I get pissed off, so here’s what I did this weekend: I started a Facebook group called Small Business Owners for NY Marriage Equality.  Feel free to join and please help us spread the word.  Let’s show Albany that aside from all the silly back-and-forth people are doing about ethics, morals and religion, this is also an economic issue that shouldn’t be ignored.  Matt and I are proud to be able to stand up for the rights of our LGBT friends and family, and we hope that you’ll all be able to stand with us.

But what if you’re not a business owner?  Still want to get involved?  Here’s a ton of stuff I’m getting active in:

What Senator Golden Said

This page has links to all the statements Senator Golden has made over the past week, the specific legislation that was drafted and more.  It’s a hoot and a holler! 

Catholics for Marriage Equality

I was raised to be a devout Catholic, and I’ll be honest, my church’s opposition to marriage equality really bothers me.  I was taught that of all the things God wanted from us, the most important was to love and respect our fellow man as we would want to be ourselves.  Here’s a nice synopsis from my buddy Jesus. He was pretty clear about the whole “loving each other” thing.  Really don’t get how people keep screwing that up.  Anyhow- if you are a fellow Catholic, head on over there and sign their declaration supporting our LGBT friends, and know that you’re not alone, and that there’s nothing shameful or sinful about love and tolerance.

CALL YOUR SENATOR!!!

No need to spend valuable time tracking down your senators name and info.  Click that link above- I’ve set up a page where all you need to do is put in your basic information and phone number, and the site will automatically set up a phone call between you and your senator.  How brilliant and easy is that! 

New York Marriage Equality

An excellent site set up by a very good friend of ours with tons of links, information, and other ways to get involved.

And finally……

RAAAAAALLLLLYYYYYYYY!!!!!

Next Monday at 6:30 in my stomping grounds of Bay Ridge, outside of Senator Golden’s office on 75th Street and 5th Avenue.  It doesn’t matter if you’re a Democrat, Republican, Independent, Libertarian or Rent Is Too Damn High-er- if you believe in equality, we need you to come down and make your voice heard!

I have not marched in a political rally since I was in high school, but Matt and I will be at this one with our kids in support of their Aunts Ro & Sara, Uncles Sal & Damien and Uncles Telly & Jimmy.  I pray that I will never have to try and explain to my children that even though God loves everyone the same, people still see it fit to treat some differently based on who they are meant to love.  Seriously, if you want to really understand how ridiculous it is to be fighting a war on LOVE, try explaining it to a child.  That will fix you ass more than any blog post or political rally ever will.

And I will vow this now: when the first gay couple can legally marry in New York State, we’ll do their wedding cupcakes for FREE.  Nothing would make us happier.

So now…..cupcakes.  Cuz you know, when we’re not plotting and scheming on ways to make the world a better place, we try to get a little baking done.

Clockwise from front: Southern Belle, Strawberry Shortcake, Creamsicle, CPB

Strawberry Shortcake:  Vanilla cake splashed with strawberry juice, mascarpone buttercream, strawberry compote

Creamsicle: Orange cake, vanilla buttercream, hand candied orange peel

CPB:  Chocolate cake, peanut butter buttercream, roasted peanuts, ganache

Southern Belle: Banana bourbon cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter bourbon pecans

AVAILABLE AT:

CAFE AT SAM’S BAKERY- 94th Street off 3rd Ave, Bay Ridge

HOM- Third Avenue and 88th Street, Bay Ridge

THE CUPCAKE STAND: Fifth Avenue between 60th and 61st, Sunset Park

CRESPELLA CREPE & ESPRESSO BAR- 321  7th Avenue at 9th Street, Park Slope

RED HOOK LOBSTER POUND: 284 Van Brunt Street, Red Hook and Roving Food Truck *Whoopie Pies and Wild Maine Blueberry Cobbler cupcakes only*

LINK CAFE @ THE SHERATON TRIBECA: 307 Canal Street, Tribeca

JOE: COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY-  W. 120th btwn Broadway & Amsterdam Avenue

*Note: Not all locations receive all flavors.  The flavors recieved are determined by each store’s management, not by us.  If there’s something in the upcoming rotation you want to see, let them know directly

Have we all seen the cat hugging the kitten yet?  In the event you’ve been living under a rock, here it is.  And in the event you’ve seen it, do you really mind seeing it again?

SQUEEEEEEE!!!! Who wants to come over and cuddle?!?!?!

Anyway, if you’re actually still in town and reading this, there are cupcakes in stores because we love working on holiday weekends.  So close the computer, go buy one, sit outside somewhere and enjoy this incredibly beautiful day. 

And if you get bored, the cuddling offer still stands.

Clockwise from front: Creamsicle, The Hinsch, Southern Belle, Blueberry Cobbler

Blueberry Cobbler: Vanilla cake, blueberry juice, vanilla buttercream, wild Maine blueberry compote, cinnamon streusel

Creamsicle: Orange cake, vanilla buttercream, hand candied orange peel

The Hinsch:  Chocolate malted cake, vanilla buttercream, malted chocolate sauce, homemade malted milk balls

Southern Belle: Banana bourbon cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter bourbon pecans

AVAILABLE AT:

CAFE AT SAM’S BAKERY- 94th Street off 3rd Ave, Bay Ridge

THE CUPCAKE STAND: Fifth Avenue between 60th and 61st, Sunset Park

CRESPELLA CREPE & ESPRESSO BAR- 321  7th Avenue at 9th Street, Park Slope

TAZZA CAFES- Henry off Atlantic and Clark off Henry, Brooklyn Heights

RADISH- Bedford Ave off N8th, Williamsburg

RED HOOK LOBSTER POUND: 284 Van Brunt Street, Red Hook and Roving Food Truck *Whoopie Pies and Wild Maine Blueberry Cobbler cupcakes only*

CAKESHOP- Ludlow btwn Stanton & Rivington, Lower East Side 

LINK CAFE @ THE SHERATON TRIBECA: 307 Canal Street, Tribeca

JOE: COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY-  W. 120th btwn Broadway & Amsterdam Avenue

*Note: Not all locations receive all flavors.  The flavors recieved are determined by each store’s management, not by us.  If there’s something in the upcoming rotation you want to see, let them know directly

You know what I love most about the Bronx Zoo Cobra? That she was able to create a nationwide hysteria by doing absolutely nothing more than taking a nap in the corner for 6 days.  I bust my ass every day- no hysteria.  Evidently I am doing something wrong.

But of course, we needed to make one of our very special cupcakes just for the cobra. Partially because it’s April Fools and we’re feeling a bit silly, and partially because the Bronx freaking zoo lost a freaking cobra.  I just don’t even think I could make something like that up.  Our cobra cupcake is an homage to her homeland of Egypt, with lots of cardamom, orange flower essence, and Egyptian rice pudding buttercream. Yes, that’s right, we mixed rice pudding with our buttercream.  It’s unbelievable- you have to taste it.

Another new flavor today: Chocolate Cheerwine!  For those of you who don’t know what Cheerwine is, it’s a cherry soda from the south that’s one of the best I’ve ever tasted (I’m a shameless soda junkie).  It’s nearly impossible to find in New York except if you go to……

…….COURT STREET GROCERS, OUR BRAND SPANKING NEW LOCATION!!!  Not only are they bringing the cupcake magic back to Carroll Gardens, but they are also our Cheerwine supplier.  See, there’s no distributor of the stuff up here in NY- in fact, the closest warehouse is all the way down in Virginia.  So a few times a month, the Court Street Grocers drive halfway down the side of the country, load their van up with Cheerwine, and bring it back up here.  They’re making another run this weekend, so make sure you get there next week before they sell out- they only make a few trips each month. (Also make sure you get their egg and cheese sandwich- Matt had one a few days ago and won’t shut up about it)

And if you’re excited about us having one brand new location, how about TWO BRAND SPANKING NEW LOCATIONS!!!!  I bet you’re all like “DUDE!”, and we’re like “DUDE, YAH!”, and you’re like “Oh, DUUUUUDE!”.  We get that all the time, don’t worry.

After a few weeks in limbo, we have found our way straight back into Ditmas Park, courtesy of Qathra on Cortelyou Road.  We need to thank you guys for this spot- after we left Market we got lots of tweets and emails from upset fans who didn’t want us leaving the neighborhood, and you pretty much unanimously told us to check this place out. So thank you for pointing us in the right direction- Ditmas Park has been supporting us since the very beginning, and we wouldn’t have felt right just up and leaving you guys.

Now onto flavors!

Clockwise from front: Egyptian Cobra, Chocolate Cheerwine, The Liddabit, Southern Belle

NEW!  LIMITED EDITION!!!  

The Bronx Zoo Egyptian Cobra:  Orange cardamom cake, Egyptian rice pudding buttercream, brown butter spiced rice crispies

NEW! NOT LIMITED EDITION, BUT STILL SPECIAL IN IT’S OWN WAY!

Chocolate Cheerwine:  Chocolate Cheerwine cake, chocolate buttercream, Cheerwine ganche, Cheerwine simmered dried cherries

The Liddabit:  Chocolate cake, nougat-salted caramel buttercream, peanuts, salted caramel & ganache drizzles

Southern Belle:  Banana bourbon cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter and bourbon glazed pecans

Available at:

THIS SATURDAY ONLY: THE BROOKLYN FLEA AS PART OF THE BAKE SALE FOR JAPAN!  Lafayette Ave & Vanderbilt- Fort Greene

CAFE AT SAM’S BAKERY- 94th Street off 3rd Ave, Bay Ridge

CRESPELLA CREPE & ESPRESSO BAR- 321  7th Avenue at 9th Street, Park Slope

BLUE APRON FOODS: Union St. off 7th Ave, Park Slope

TAZZA CAFES- Henry off Atlantic and Clark off Henry, Brooklyn Heights

COURT STREET GROCERS: 485 Court Street, Carroll Gardens

QATHRA:  1112 Cortelyou Road, Ditmas Park

RADISH- Bedford Ave off N8th, Williamsburg

RED HOOK LOBSTER POUND: 284 Van Brunt Street, Red Hook *Wild Maine Blueberry Cobbler cupcakes only*

EASTERN DISTRICT- Manhattan Ave off Eagle St, Greenpoint

BROOKLYN STANDARD:  Nassau Ave & Jewel St, Greenpoint

CAKESHOP- Ludlow btwn Stanton & Rivington, Lower East Side

THE BROOKLYNEER:  220 W. Houston Street, West Village

JOE: COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY-  W. 120th btwn Broadway & Amsterdam Avenue

JOE: GRAND CENTRAL STATION-  44 Grand Central Terminal, Near the Greybar Passage

*Note: Not all locations receive all flavors.  The flavors recieved are determined by each store’s management, not by us.  If there’s something in the upcoming rotation you want to see, let them know directly.

You know what stinks? We’ve got about a gazillion super-exciting things happening right now, and I’m not allowed to talk about ANY of them. It’s like when I had to keep my mouth shut about the DeKalb Market for months and months and months, only a lot more so.  I promise you’ll get drips and drabs of good news here and there soon, I really really really really promise………..just can’t talk about any of it right now.  Blargh. 

Now that I’ve led you off with a gigantic tease, I’ll hit you with some bad news: effective immediately, we’ve terminated our relationship with Lily O’Brien’s. It was something that hadn’t been working for a while, but there’s no ill will- we love the owners dearly, we’re just moving in separate directions.  As of now, we’re bringing all our Midtown stuff to Joe at Grand Central Terminal (except for this week since The Great American Bakesale is happening at GCT- go support it and help the fight against hunger!).

We’re going to have at least one new location at the end of this week, and then there’s……ok, more stuff I’m not able to talk about yet (stupid non-disclosure agreements!!!).  This is really killing me guys. 

How about this: head over to our Facebook page and tell me a joke or a story to distract me.  Ask me a question, post a link to a cat with a piece of bacon taped to him- whatever.  With my ADD this should be pretty simple- just remember I’m partial to jokes about little old men, funny pet photos, and shiny things.

Now onto flavors before I say something that’s going to get me sued!

Clockwise from front: The Aris: The Liddabit, Southern Belle, German Chocolate

THE ARIS:  Walnut cake, honey butter, Greek yogurt buttercream, honey-orange glazed walnuts

GERMAN CHOCOLATE: Chocolate cake, salted caramel buttercream, roasted coconut

SOUTHERN BELLE:  Banana bourbon cake, vanilla buttercream, brown butter & bourbon glazed pecans

THE LIDDABIT:  Chocolate cake, nougat & salted caramel buttercream, peanuts, ganache & caramel drizzle

Available at:

CAFE AT SAM’S BAKERY- 94th Street off 3rd Ave, Bay Ridge

HOM- Third Avenue & 88th Street, Bay Ridge

TAZZA CAFES- Clark St off Henry AND Henry St off Atlantic, Brooklyn Heights

CRESPELLA-7th Ave off 9th St, Park Slope

BLUE APRON FOODS-  Union St. off 7th Ave, Park Slope